So did sunny Phoenix fulfill everyone's expectations for the first night of American Idol? I have to say that the bad wasn't that bad. Here's my assessments (I'll put in pics where I have them for clarity):
Wolverine - tap shoes were a bad choice. hearing his voice on the radio this morning, I came to find his singing wasn't awful actually. The crotch grab, however, was unfortunate.
Ahhh -- Barra barra cuda.... now this was kind of nice. I was just remarking that we now need a rocker chick. And her hair made me think of Dabba's fave super-hero Hot Lava Girl:
Hey - it's Bikini Girl! Heard her playback on the radio and yeah, she sucks. Get yer mind outta the gutter, you know what I mean. She cannot sing. And you don't accomplish runs by moving your jaw and head around.
Cactus man - this was wierd. If he had stopped goofing around for one minute his voice was pretty good. But I think he was high. 
Blind dude - I really hope he can keep it up. I'm not sure he can and I don't want to see him there week after week on sympathy.
Oh dude....first - I am not sure that your hair isn't a wig held on by that karate kid headband. There was so much wrong here. He was too sad. Jon Bon Jovi doesn't cry while he sings does he?
much much too pink. but i also thought the judges were way too hard on her. she's 16 for cryin out loud. give her break.
and then there was the dude who swallowed Wayne Newton - the craziest singing technique I'd ever seen, the guy singing some seriously bad Barry White, the geeky kid could be a new Clay Aiken, but I can't say I was blown away by anyone. The girl who sang Etta James' at last...eh... if you listen to all these sound bites a couple things become apparent. The bad ones were not atrocious (at least what we saw last night. I'm sure there's some humdingers in the can for a special later) and the good ones were not remarkable...and they all pretty much sang in the same key.... really. But that's ok...lot's of auditions to go...next stop Louisville? Oh the Batman will be beside himself. I can see it now - he'll keep asking for names just in case he knows someone, cuz you know KY's state motto: 15 million people, 15 last names. yeah, I said it. Lastly, I am very concerned about David Cooks new album cover because he every much resembles a Sleestak:
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